Strom Watch in NW

STORM WATCH TELECAST FROM MILD NW OREGON

Julie: Let's go now to Bill, our meteorologist for all the latest in this coming snow storm everyone is wondering about in the Metro Area.  But first, check out this footage from Seattle where this WALL of snow has just started to hit.

(video footage of  rather tame looking average snow.)

Julie: What you're seeing here is snow, that's right SNOW falling in a sports arena!

(five more seconds of snow)

Julie: Now let's get to Steve braving the elements out there in the West Hills, the place we usually expect to see the weather when it hits.

(video footage of Steve dressed in Columbia Sportswear with the West Hills in the background [ it's dark, he could have been anywhere, really])

Steve: Hi there Julie, as you can see I'm out here in the West Hills to show you guys what they're dealing with out here. There's a slight breeze picking up and about an hour and a half ago we had a couple flakes of snow falling…

(camera pans to show us the areola of light around a street light)

Julie: *newscaster camaraderie chuckle* Well, Steve it sure doesn't look like much is going on there yet!

Steve: Yes Julie, right now we're just not seeing what we expect everyone will be seeing in the morning which is the snow that has been predicted to fall here in the Metro Area this weekend. As I was saying we did see some snow flakes falling about an hour and a half ago right over in this area and some other debris drifting around in the breeze up there. However, as of right now all is calm and snow free up here in the West Hills.

Julie: *ingratiating smile* Well Steve, thank you very much for being out there in the cold and be sure to let us know if anything develops out there before the end of the newscast. Now let's got to the Trimet Bus Barn and see how they're preparing for the Snow Storm on it's way to the Metro Area.

Bus Barn Employee: Hi Julie, We've gone ahead and chained up all two hundred buses in preparation for tomorrow. Normally we might chain around fifty buses for a situation like this and plan to send those buses to the areas with the highest elevation but *shrug* we decided we're just going to be absolutely prepared for the weather and so we are.

(video footage of a bus tire being chained up in completely unsnowlike weather)

Julie: Well thank you for letting us know. You also said that buses should run on regular schedule for tomorrow.

Bus Barn Employee: That's right Julie.

Julie: Alright then let's go to Bill our Meteorologist and see what he has to tell about this coming storm.

Bill: Thanks, Julie.

(Video footage of ridiculous maps that Bill has colored giant patches on in pink and blue)

Bill: As you can see here, the pink areas are where I expect we should be seeing snow. As soon as those temperatures drop there should be snow. We have the cold. We have the moisture. Everything adds up to the sure possibility of snow.

(video footage of another map Bill has doctored with arrows going every conceivable direction)

Bill: We have winds coming in here (cold place that does have snow), there (another cold place that DOES have snow), all creating the perfect elements for a storm like the one I expect we will be seeing by morning.

Julie: Alright then, Bill. Now let's look at footage of what snow looks like in other places where it snows.

(two minutes of footage of snow in other places.)

Julie: Tune back in, in an hour for further updates on this coming storm as well as our broadcast tomorrow morning which will be starting one hour early and remember this station is THE station to turn to for all the latest in STORM WATCH TECHNOLOGY. Can we just take it to Steve one more time to see if the snow is falling yet in the West Hills?

Steve: Hi Julie. We did see a flake again, over there in the light from the street lamp but as yet that's about all we've seen out here.

Julie: Alright, Steve. I guess we'll all wait for tomorrow to see if the snow develops. Goodnight Everybody.

UPDATE:

Sorry I haven't been able to answer comments. I'm crossing my fingers this update will post. We did get snow here. It's the very cold dry kind that you can't really do anything with. The Man says it's a deal break and we have to move because all the wind just blows the snow right out of our yard and off the cliff in front of the house. There's like an inch or two in the valley (Portland) and next to nothing up here in Corbett. We've just been hanging out inside by the fire, playing board games with the kids and laughing our asses off at all the idiots driving around. The Man is giddy. He just loves cold and snow. I love watching the three lanes of traffic on the freeway. You have people going way too fast on the left, people going way too slow in the middle and people pulled over and spinning out on the right. AND there's the people who abandoned their cars to hitchhike. I guess they're thinking whoever picks them up will have more sense than they do. I would post a transcript of the helicopter guy but I'm afraid only Muddy shares my dry sense of humor.